Day 9

Another early out due to the heat...and folks, it is WARM!  This is the kind of heat that causes me to do crazy things, like finish an entire row of double stuff Oreos.  Something must be done!!!  I really do think I am crazy.  But in all honesty, reviewing and learning more about my belief in Jesus and the sacraments really makes me step back and ask the question, "This is actually what I profess and believe in?!?"  Not because I doubt the trueness or legitimacy of my faith, but I become excited, overwhelmed, and zealous when I realize how AWESOME Jesus is and how much He really does love us on an individual basis!  

Curtis Martin, founder of FOCUS (Fellowship of Catholic University Students) once asked us at a conference another question..."Do you believe that what you believe is really real?"

I posed a similar question to my students in regards to whether they really do believe that the sacraments can and do transform our lives.  

I woke up this morning and almost hit the snooze button.  My plan was to get up early and go to mass before making my way over to school.  I turned my alarm off, put my head back down on the pillow, and for the first time in a long time, I told myself "No, today is the Lord's day, and He wants to feed me."  What?  This thought could not have been of myself.  I've always tried to make Jesus the center of my life, but there are times when I forget that and get distracted.  This morning I woke up with the mission of Jesus instilled in me.  That does not make me perfect.  I am far for perfect.  I am striving for holiness.

Then I went to school, found out we had another early out and decided to edit my plan for today.  Instead of jumping into the topic of Baptism, I really tried to get them talking about their experiences with the sacraments, talk about their first communions, first reconciliations, and there were some pretty funny stories and cute things shared.  But then I asked the question, do you really believe that Jesus is present and can transform YOU through receiving the sacraments?  By praying at mass?  Through personal prayer?  CAN HE?  

Most of my students cannot recall a time where they felt Jesus truly speaking to their souls.  The idea of God as a person (intellect and will) and that they can pray to Him and have a conversation with Him is a pretty foreign concept to them.  But I want them to have that SO badly.

I know I can teach.  My students can recall information from days ago about the definition of a person, the definition of a sacrament, they can and do know A LOT of information, a lot about God.  More than anything, I want them to KNOW God.  I don't want to just catechize.  I want to evangelize!  I want Him to be their "Abba," their father.  I want them to love Him and to put Him at the center of their lives.  I want them to know how much He loves them and longs to have an even closer relationship with them.  My students are GREAT.  They are constantly surprised by what we talk about and come up with more and more questions about everything from why we bless ourselves with holy water to whether or not they should receive Jesus in the Eucharist by hand or tongue, how often they should go to confession, if our sins actually go away, etc.  This was all one shortened class by the way...  Their hearts, all of our hearts, were made to be in right relationship with God and all of creation, especially our brothers and sisters.

This morning I really felt the call.  This song perfectly fits a prayer I've found myself saying to God.  You can listen to it on YouTube by clicking here.  It's called "O My Soul" by Audrey Assad.  Here are the lyrics:

Rivers and stones and the trees of the field, they sing in the night 
And a thousand tongues lay deep in your lungs to raise to the sky 
Don't lie to yourself, o my soul—love your God. 

Deep in your heart you feather and tar your folly and fear: 
Expose them for the fools they are, and the world comes clear. 
Don't lie to yourself, o my soul—love your God. 

Your worries will never love you 
They'll leave you all alone 
But your God will not forsake you 
O my soul.

We need to let ourselves love God!  The more I teach my students, the more I am able to hold myself accountable.  Living alone has given me the opportunity to recognize my ultimate need for God.  I mean, I already knew that, but that need is uncovering itself more and more in the silence of my being, at mass, and in my classroom.

Love your God.  You are wonderful.  Happy Tuesday!